Zombies Adrift in Cougar Town

I have lived in cougar town for a few weeks now. Cougar town has the best football team in the entire world! However football is not the only thing that goes down on usual nights here, as I have been pushing mongo around town and doing pop-o-wheelies I started to see some sort of change happening around twelve o clock. Just before the clock hits 12 all of the Zoobies, get to their homes and turn off their lights. I was wondering why it was that they would go to sleep so early, perhaps then knew something that I didn’t. This kept me curious for a few days before the “dreaded night” happened. It all started off with me, and Morgan Jennings where bored and my house, feeling it was a somewhat nice Thursday night we got the Idea to go riding skateboards. We got in his car to mongo around the high school. This was good times, but we felt that their would be a better place to CATCH SOME AIR. We went to a somewhat new zoobie living hotspot, because we needed to find skateboarding obstacles. We where being loud out front having a grand old time, when Morgan says to me “what is that noise”. We look up in the zoobie headquarters to see some, what we though where to be BYU students dancing to Shakira’s hit “hips don’t lie”. We though it was pretty funny so we hid behind a power box to watch for a little longer. As we watched it appeared that they where not dancing. They looked like they where floating in an odd motion. Mo turned and asked me if I was seeing what he was, I said yes and we looked back quickly, only to find that they where gone. We thought this was weird, but we just though we where seeing things. We continued to CATCH AIR, when we noticed a couple get out of their car wich we had been skating by, not knowing they where their the whole time. We just figured they where SOAKING, the new hip thing to do in cougar town. By now the clock showed 12:45 and we where growing sleepy. We slowed down with our skateboarding and stopped to talk about adventures to be had the following day. A boy and a girl walked by us, not even talking to each other and climbed into a different car. They turned the car on but didn’t drive it anywhere. Me and Morgan, being the snoops we are snuck around to hide in the trees and see what was really going on. We peered through a bush to see that soaking was not the event taking place. We couldn’t believe what our eyes where seeing, there was BLOOD SUCKING going on!!??(Story continued by Morgan spencer jennings)........We looked at eachother astonished by what our eyes had just gaized upon. We realized that these were not zoobies THEY WERE MOTHERTRUCKIN' ZOMBIES!!!!!! Steve and myself made a quick dash behind the bush to hopefully not be seen by zombies who we thought were some normal zoobs doing there normal after dark SOAK!! we thought to ourselves that the zoobies obviously turn into zombies after dark.... so they try to control the zombie zoobs by keeping them cooped up in there dorms but Zombies crave fresh air and FRESH HUMAN blood...
Steve and i soon heard footsteps behind us and to our dismay it was a red head the next worst thing but we were not worried about this fire crotch so we tried to warn him of the blood sucking zombies ahead but he just ignored us and journeyed on ward and just like we thought we watched the zombies lurk up too this innocent red head and take him down and turn this once red head into a ZOMBIE......... me steve made a slick move to the car being unseen by the zombies i scrambled for my keys finally i got a solid grip on my keys and turned the ignition, the egine sputtered and cought the attention of the zombies.. me and steve realized that we were going to have to travel by foot if my car didn't start.. so we made a break for it they were three zombies and two of us... we noticed that the wendy's was a safe place for non-zombie humans.... so thats we made a break for.. The were two zobies ahead of us and one behind us.... we needed to figure out a way to lose them or even better DESTROY them... one approached steve giving me a chance to break away steve jotted to the left and then jolted to the right the zombie was to low and broke both his ankles steve quickly curb checked the crap out of the hopeless zombie destroying its zombieness forever.... one down and two to go we were getting closer to our destination... we still had a zombie on our tail and a one ahead me steve noticed bicycle rack ahead and noticed it was full of hip fixed gear bicycles and hurry and tore the spokes off a few of them as we dashed past... we had to act quick so me and steve decided to put our mighty duck powers to the test and separated to destroy the zombies... steve ran straight up a light pole doing a quadruple backflip 1080 and stunning the zombie by stabbing it right in the heart destroying the 2nd zombie... i decide to launch myself into the earths external atmosphere by launching off a fire hydrant and doing a chuck norris 1260 off a stop light and stabbed the last zombie right in the face... MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!! steve and I exchanged high fives as we entered the holy Wendy's .. so steve and i treated ourselves to some junior bacons and a safe rest of the night at steves Crib........ talk about another night of defeating evil and mystic creatures... from that night forward me and steve decided to really watch our backs if we ever had to be in zoobie town at such a time again....The End..



Story key
Cougar Town-Home of the Brigham Young University Cougars
Mongo- Wacky way of skateboarding
Zoobies-clever name for byu students
Soaking-look up definition at www. urbandictionary. com!!
Chuck Norris-the most badass actor/booty kicker of all time, fully equipt with the best mustache of mankind.